EMTLife Contest - A Patient or Moment in EMS that Changed Your Life

[EMSDude54343]

I work in the communications center as a call taker and dispatcher. When I first started a few years ago, my primary role was fire call taking and fire dispatch, EMS was handled by a separate EMS agency, and we acted as their back up when there were more calls than call takers and they acted as our back up.
Well about two weeks out of training and being on my own taking calls, (with very little EMS call exposure) I was assigned to the fire call taking position for the day. At about 0700 as the sun rose on a very foggy morning, we started to receive a very high volume of calls for a traffic crash that was a passenger vehicle head on vs. a semi. We already had units enroute and could here EMS still getting more calls. And all the calltakers and dispatchers for EMS were taking calls and we could hear more ringing, so I got ready to get the "roll-overs" from EMS. We all figured it was going to be a bad call because of the amount of calls we were getting on it, and the info the callers were telling us. I expected to get a passerby with very little info, not somone with pt contact...
The first call I was able to pick up was a middle aged male, he advised that he just witnessed a passenger car hit a semi head on and he was with what appeared to be an 8 year old female in the car, unconscious and barely breathing. She was sitting in what appeared to be teh front seat, and the entire front of the car was laying down the road. The caller also said that her mother was thrown into the roadway, and her father was thrown into the woods. I started triage over the phone and started on airway instructions as her breathing was agonal. The caller started to get very excited and would only repeat the phrase “If you get here quick, you can save her!” I could hear the pt in the background gasping and heard her take her last breaths. I was unable to calm him down to give the instructions and basically froze listening to the caller say that over and over. I felt completely helpless. This was my first “bad call”, I had other bad calls in training but always had a trainer to rely on.
This accident occurred on a two lane highway in the middle of a National Forest, so the closet units were about twenty minutes away. I basically sat there frozen listening to this caller while also working the radio, until units arrived. The first unit on scene immediately called signal 7 (dead person) on the only pt in the vehicle (my pt). I continued to work the radio channel as they called a trauma alert on the mother and requested a helicopter, and requested K9 form the sheriffs dept to assist in locate the person thrown into the woods. After completing the radio channel, I got up from my console and walked outside, on the way out our Captain ask me what’s wrong; he could obviously see something is wrong on my face. I don’t answer him and continue to walk outside. I can feel everyone’s eyes on me as I walk out of the center, there are a total of four agencies in the center, so there are a lot of people watching. All I can think, is to just make it outside before losing it, don’t talk, you wont be able to hold it in. My Captain followed me outside, and it’s then that I break down. I’m not exactly a perfectionist, but I strive to do the best that I can at everything, always strive to be the better person at all tests that are thrown at me. In EMT school, my instructors came to me to help other students that were struggling. This was the first event that made me realize in EMS, sometimes there is just nothing that you can do. I felt completely useless, and that if I was to take another call I would fail someone again. I felt like I had failed that pt, like I was to blame for her death. I ended up sitting there for about 2 hours while talking to my supervisor and my Captain about whether I would ever walk back in and take another call.
Come to find out it was only the two pts, and they were actually in their early twenties, passing in a no passing zone. It really hit home once I figured out they were the same age as me, and it really made me stop thinking I was invincible (like we all think we are at that age).
I eventually walked back in to finish my shift and asked for the next day off to continue to think about whether I could actually do this job or not. I obviously am still here, working. I have never “lost” another caller since, and have been able to calm down all my callers to be able to treat and give instructions over the phone. I also haven’t ‘froze’ again taking bad calls. I took that event as a lesson to better myself at my job, and have done my best to pass that knowledge onto all the new people that I train. I have even made a class for our new trainees on how to control an un-controllable caller.
Since that call I have taken countless “bad calls”, I have used what I learned that day in every call I’ve taken since. I am now considered to be the black cloud of the center, if anything bad is going to happen, it will probably happen while I am working. But I know look at that as a good thing, I am prepared and ready to handle anything, I look forward to the challenge and opportunity to make someone’s bad a day a little bit better.

 

[mycrofft]

Called to a man-down west of Lincoln Nebraska, to find a man wearing a dinner jacket lying in the gutter by stockyards, undergoing CPR by the fire department. His wife in her evening gown was sitting nearby on the curb, crying uncontrollably. We worked as well as we could, but even with the efforts of the Bryan Memorial Hospital Heart Team we were unable to revive him.

On the way to the hospital, his wife told us they had gone out for his 46th birthday, they were successful and lived west of town by the lake in a new house, and were on the way home from supper when he said "Honey, I don't feel good", pulled over, and died behind the wheel. This was before cell phones, to this day I do not know how help was summoned.

It taught me that our plans and dreams can be shelved on a moment's notice, and we have to at least find as much humor (even if it is about ourselves) as we can, take ourselves a little less seriously, and appreciate the ones we hold dear as much as we can.

 

[bigbaldguy]

I work in the communications center as a call taker and dispatcher. When I first started a few years ago, my primary role was fire call taking and fire dispatch, EMS was handled by a separate EMS agency, and we acted as their back up when there were more calls than call takers and they acted as our back up.
Well about two weeks out of training and being on my own taking calls, (with very little EMS call exposure) I was assigned to the fire call taking position for the day. At about 0700 as the sun rose on a very foggy morning, we started to receive a very high volume of calls for a traffic crash that was a passenger vehicle head on vs. a semi. We already had units enroute and could here EMS still getting more calls. And all the calltakers and dispatchers for EMS were taking calls and we could hear more ringing, so I got ready to get the "roll-overs" from EMS. We all figured it was going to be a bad call because of the amount of calls we were getting on it, and the info the callers were telling us. I expected to get a passerby with very little info, not somone with pt contact...
The first call I was able to pick up was a middle aged male, he advised that he just witnessed a passenger car hit a semi head on and he was with what appeared to be an 8 year old female in the car, unconscious and barely breathing. She was sitting in what appeared to be teh front seat, and the entire front of the car was laying down the road. The caller also said that her mother was thrown into the roadway, and her father was thrown into the woods. I started triage over the phone and started on airway instructions as her breathing was agonal. The caller started to get very excited and would only repeat the phrase “If you get here quick, you can save her!” I could hear the pt in the background gasping and heard her take her last breaths. I was unable to calm him down to give the instructions and basically froze listening to the caller say that over and over. I felt completely helpless. This was my first “bad call”, I had other bad calls in training but always had a trainer to rely on.
This accident occurred on a two lane highway in the middle of a National Forest, so the closet units were about twenty minutes away. I basically sat there frozen listening to this caller while also working the radio, until units arrived. The first unit on scene immediately called signal 7 (dead person) on the only pt in the vehicle (my pt). I continued to work the radio channel as they called a trauma alert on the mother and requested a helicopter, and requested K9 form the sheriffs dept to assist in locate the person thrown into the woods. After completing the radio channel, I got up from my console and walked outside, on the way out our Captain ask me what’s wrong; he could obviously see something is wrong on my face. I don’t answer him and continue to walk outside. I can feel everyone’s eyes on me as I walk out of the center, there are a total of four agencies in the center, so there are a lot of people watching. All I can think, is to just make it outside before losing it, don’t talk, you wont be able to hold it in. My Captain followed me outside, and it’s then that I break down. I’m not exactly a perfectionist, but I strive to do the best that I can at everything, always strive to be the better person at all tests that are thrown at me. In EMT school, my instructors came to me to help other students that were struggling. This was the first event that made me realize in EMS, sometimes there is just nothing that you can do. I felt completely useless, and that if I was to take another call I would fail someone again. I felt like I had failed that pt, like I was to blame for her death. I ended up sitting there for about 2 hours while talking to my supervisor and my Captain about whether I would ever walk back in and take another call.
Come to find out it was only the two pts, and they were actually in their early twenties, passing in a no passing zone. It really hit home once I figured out they were the same age as me, and it really made me stop thinking I was invincible (like we all think we are at that age).
I eventually walked back in to finish my shift and asked for the next day off to continue to think about whether I could actually do this job or not. I obviously am still here, working. I have never “lost” another caller since, and have been able to calm down all my callers to be able to treat and give instructions over the phone. I also haven’t ‘froze’ again taking bad calls. I took that event as a lesson to better myself at my job, and have done my best to pass that knowledge onto all the new people that I train. I have even made a class for our new trainees on how to control an un-controllable caller.
Since that call I have taken countless “bad calls”, I have used what I learned that day in every call I’ve taken since. I am now considered to be the black cloud of the center, if anything bad is going to happen, it will probably happen while I am working. But I know look at that as a good thing, I am prepared and ready to handle anything, I look forward to the challenge and opportunity to make someone’s bad a day a little bit better.

I've often thought that the job of dispatch must be so much harder than being on scene. The couple of times I've had to call 911 for accidents ect. the dispatchers have always been incredibly calm and just generally awesome. I could never do that job.

 

[EMSDude54343]

I've often thought that the job of dispatch must be so much harder than being on scene. The couple of times I've had to call 911 for accidents ect. the dispatchers have always been incredibly calm and just generally awesome. I could never do that job.

It does have its challenges compared to being on the road, treatment over the phone is different and there is only so much you can do, and comming from being trained on the road with little experience in the field to being in here was a real shock. I think one of the biggest chalengese face, is the fact that all we have to calm somone down is our voice, while in the field you can use your body language, voice, facial expression, etc.

 

[we talking bout practice]

My first month on the job w were dispatched to a 20 something year old female with little information because the call was coming from a child. All this 5 year old could get out that was pertinent to the call was that mom was hanging from the ceiling.
We arrived on scene and unload everything as you would in all other possible codes. We enter the bungalow and to the right are 5-6 pairs of multi colored rubber boots, to my left we see some cartons playing in the living room. Lights were on in the basement so that was the obvious first place to look. Down the stairs we go. The ceiling was only 6 feet high or so, unfinished walls, and narrow hallways with many turns. We find the child sitting with his knees drawn to his chest, and arms wrapped around himself. Facing his mom he seemed to be contemplating how to react to the incident and us being there. He was escorted out, and an assessment began. She had hung herself but her feet were still touching the floor as the ceiling was not high enough for a typical hanging. It would seem she had simply asphyxiated herself in her laundry room. She was warm to touch and color was such that you would still expect her to be breathing. Tubes, I.Vs, Meds, and Monitor all done and we are ready to get this young lady to the truck. This is when the husband arrived home from work. He was totally unaware to the situation and met us at the door. He was in expected hysterics and inconsolable he attempted to grab the tubing and wires claiming that she was fine as tears poured down his face. Into the truck we go and it is a 30 minute ride to the closest E.R.
En route we had a pulse and sustained B.P, but there was little hope. On arrival at the hospital she crashed again and after another 20 minutes of working on her she was declared and was to be sent for organ harvesting as she was an organ donor. I was left in the room with the pt bagging her. All alone pumping her dead lungs full with nothing to do but review the situation for the first time. This was my first arrest with a patient anywhere near my own age. She looked like my sister. She had two kids and a husband who obviously cared a lot for her. I will never understand the situations leading up to that choice but I pondered many scenarios over and over. This is the only call I have had to date that I felt personally connected to. One of the few that have made me think beyond protocols and treatments. This incident changed how I approach and manage a call over night, and also how I treat family or friends and sympathize or empathize with them.

 

[fast65]

The one call I had that changed my life is one that still makes me want to cry. I remember it so clearly, the location, the name, the weather, but most of all, the faces.

It was another slow day for me, my partner and I had just finished eating dinner and were continuing our Law and Order marathon. I had been whining all day about how I wanted a call, and being the new medic that I am, I wanted it to be something "good". It wasn't but a few minutes later that we got dispatched out for a 32 yo M having a seizure. So, I hop in the rig, copy the info down, and grab a vial of Versed. We showed up to an apartment complex, the patient's apartment was on the bottom story, so we had nice easy access for all of our supplies. I threw all my stuff on the gurney, and my partner and I wheeled it in.

We walked through a living room full of toys with two girls, not much older than 4 or 5, watching cartoons. Our patient was in the bathroom down a somewhat narrow hallway, so we dropped the gurney, and grabbed our gear. We found him lying on the floor with his head being propped up by a towel, he was CAO x PPTE, but seemed a little confused. He complained of a little difficulty breathing. I questioned both him and his fiance about the events that had transpired before my arrival, while my partner and the firefighters got vitals and rounded up medications. Turns out my patient had just been diagnosed with kidney cancer, and had been feeling weak for the past couple of days, having just started chemo. His fiance was in the bedroom when she heard him fall in the bathroom, and found him lying on the floor with seizure like activity, she said it lasted about 30 seconds.

As I finished interviewing the patient about his medical history, meds, and so on, I started a line, and had him on a cannula. Right as I secured my IV, he began having convulsions, I drew up the Versed, and was about to push it when he stopped. There was no postictal period which I found odd, and he was complaining of a worsening SOB, so we started him on a NRB. It was at this point that he started yelling to get it off his face, so we moved him back to a cannula which seemed to relieve the SOB and calmed him down. We then loaded him up and started code 1 transport to the hospital. I assured the fiance that we would take good care of him, and made sure she knew where the hospital was, before we started on our way.

I had a FF ride with me, just in case he started seizing again. Our patient was a little tachy at around 105, and BP was holding in the low 100's. It wasn't until about 2 minutes from the hospital that things went south...way south. He started yelling about how he couldn't breath and tried taking the seat belts off, we tried putting him back on a NRB, but he wasn't having any of it. His skin signs seemed to change at a moments notice; he went from a little pale, warm, and dry, to cool, pale, and diaphoretic. We tried to calm him, but it just wasn't working, mind you, he wasn't what I would call "combative", but he was obviously agitated. Then, we finally pulled into the ER.

We pulled the gurney out, and I started giving report to the ER doc...then, he looked at me and said those few words that I will never forget: "this guy is really sick". All I could think to say to him was "I know", but the truth is, I didn't know, I had no idea how sick he really was.

I hung out in the ER, watching from the corner as this guy coded soon after they RSI'd him. They got pulses back and "stabilized" him as best they could, preparing him for me to transport to the level II hospital an hour away. They ended up making the decision to fly him; and the image of his two little girls waving goodbye to him as the helicopter took off, will forever haunt me. They had no idea how sick he was...I had no idea how sick he was.

After that call, I just kind of spent the next couple of days in silence, barely talking to anyone, not even my partner when she asked me how I was doing. I couldn't stand to think of that call, I lied to that poor man's fiance, I told her I would take good care of him, and I didn't. Not only did I fail him, but I failed his family, and I failed my partner. For weeks, I felt like everyone was disappointed in me; sure they would say "it's ok, these things happen, you're a good medic, it's not your fault", but it was hard for me to believe. I felt like absolute crap, I started questioning why I'm even allowed to care for people.

It wasn't long after that call, that I realized that what a previous member here told me, holds true: just remember, if you haven't killed someone yet, just give it time. Stay in medicine long enough, and someone will die because you're too tired, slow, don't know enough, or just having a bad day.
It became evident that I had to keep studying, I had to keep learning new things, and I had to keep expanding my margin of error to exclude as many things as possible, so that I don't make another mistake like that. I know I'll never be perfect, but perhaps one day I'll be able to reach a point where that little bit of extra knowledge will make a difference for someone. That's what keeps me going.

Anyways, sorry for the long read. It's really not a story with a happy ending unfortunately, but it's the one call I've had that changed the way I see things.

 

[firetender]

All I can say is...

...you all are knocking me out!

We've got a couple of days left. I know there are some of you out there on the edge.

Don't argue with me or you or anyone. Do it!

I know you understand this isn't about you, it's about all of us.

In deepest gratitude,

Russ,
that firetender guy

 

[bigbaldguy]

5 hours left guys. Some incredible stuff so far let's keep it coming.

 

[firetender]

"Contest" status

All I can say right now is this has gone a bit beyond just being a contest and I want to take a few days to find a way to do what happened here justice. I thank you all for the glorious dilemma!

For starters, there have been wonderful submissions and responses here, so much so that, if it's okay with the other CLs, I'd like to keep this thread open (for a while anyway) for other reflections from our members on the stories that have been written here.

 

[shfd739]

Really some interesting reads here.

I lost track of the time and forgot to add mine but I dont think it comes close to some of these.

 

[webster44]

Really some interesting reads here.

I lost track of the time and forgot to add mine but I dont think it comes close to some of these.

No need to compare , whether it's a stubbed toe or code - any event can have a profound impact on a person

 

[bigbaldguy]

Really some interesting reads here.

I lost track of the time and forgot to add mine but I dont think it comes close to some of these.

No need to compare , whether it's a stubbed toe or code - any event can have a profound impact on a person

I agree. I'd like to read your story.

 

[Veneficus]

I would say every patient changes my life, some more than others, but the most profound I share with only a few.

 

[abckidsmom]

I would say every patient changes my life, some more than others, but the most profound I share with only a few.

I've been trying and trying to identify a single or a couple of incidents that changed my life and I came to a similar conclusion.

A few incidents that went poorly changed my career, gave me a strong pet peeve for certain areas of our job, to make sure that things are always done.

Failing to bring any particular incidents to mind, I decided that really, everything in our lives has the potential to change us if we let it. Some things have the potential to change us for the worse, some for the better. It's our job to set goals and make the right choices.

 

[shfd739]

I've been trying and trying to identify a single or a couple of incidents that changed my life and I came to a similar conclusion.

A few incidents that went poorly changed my career, gave me a strong pet peeve for certain areas of our job, to make sure that things are always done.

Failing to bring any particular incidents to mind, I decided that really, everything in our lives has the potential to change us if we let it. Some things have the potential to change us for the worse, some for the better. It's our job to set goals and make the right choices.

After reading Vene's reply then this and I think you summed up my thoughts as well.

The calls that went well I remember, the ones that taught me a lesson I share with others as teaching point and a few that were very humbling Ill never forget.

 

[firetender]

And the Winners are...

The idea of a contest sounded fun until I realized I volunteered to "judge". How do you compare and rate personally meaningful truths?



You don't, so I won't. Everybody who offered a story gets a book!

firefite
mm505
DPM
Anjel1030
Tigger
EMT91
Sandog
EMSDude54343
mycrofft
we talking bout practice
fast65

(Full-Disclosure: CL's already have an open invitation for a free book so BBG and abckidsmom will get copies as well if they don't have one already.)


We got to witness some lovely acts of bravery and honesty in these stories, Thank You all!


And one of these Member-winners is now eligible for the Grand Prize! How the hell was I supposed to handle that?

DARTS!


Yup, me and some of the CLs went back and forth since I changed the rules of the game. Bottom line NOBODY wanted to make the call on who gets Top Prize, so I got stuck with the choice, which I refused to make on my own.

So I got out a set of darts that I haven't used in years, tacked a card with all the participants names on it on a board and, without the influence of alcohol, tossed them until one hit squarely on a name. (It took me a while :wacko

Sandog, you have been chosen by forces beyond me including, gravity, wind-shear and lack of coordination to claim the Top Prize of the book, gift certificate and whatever else BBG throws in, Congratulations!

Being firetender, of course I have a point to make here that I'd like you all to consider. When you share your stories it's not for you as much as it is for all of us AND our patients.


We are human beings living out important parts of our lives in EMS and we need each others' help to understand the territory we are navigating. These stories reflect aspects of the work that many of us experience, each in his or her own way.

Thank you all for giving us more insight (and Heart!) to work with in our personal/professional development! I encourage each of you to share your experiences with each other here and in the "real world" as if it would really make a difference.

You know it does!

 

[MMiz]

Congratulations to the contest winners! It was great reading your touching stories.

Please PM me to receive your copy of Russ' book, Moments in the Death of a Flesh Mechanic ... a healer's rebirth.

Thank again for the awesome submissions! Check out our August e-newsletter for details about our next contest.

 

[Sandog]

The idea of a contest sounded fun until I realized I volunteered to "judge". How do you compare and rate personally meaningful truths?

Sandog, you have been chosen by forces beyond me including, gravity, wind-shear and lack of coordination to claim the Top Prize of the book, gift certificate and whatever else BBG throws in, Congratulations!

Thanks... I think Darts huh? :unsure: So it just goes to show ya, if it aint one dart, it's another (Gilda Radner, sorta). I thought all the stories were so good and did not think my story had a chance, so thanks to the dart toss.

The dart begs to question, is life serendipitous or mere happenstance? What ever it may be, our encounters in the field will appear in dartboard fashion, some good, others not so good, but in the scheme of things all experiences we encounter are like blocks helping us climb higher to enlightenment in all our endeavors, what ever they may be.

Thank you for the honor.

 

[Anjel]

Awesome. Thanks guys. I look forward to reading it.

 

[DesertMedic66]

H

This was a great contest and I look forward to reading it. I'm not a huge reading fan but I will have no problem at all with reading this book.

Thanks to all who were involved with putting the contest together.