Maria: Well, hell, I am sorry that you are in such a funk and since everybody else has thrown in pearls of wisdom, I will too.
First of all, where are you located? In what state? If EMS is truly what you want, dont give up on it, fight for it with everything you have. I was just asking where you were since you may have untapped resources, or neighboring communities where you could work full time for somebody. I am an instructor down here, and if you want to move to NC, i could have you a full time job in a couple days....
Most of the older folks (no pun intended) remember one of the first posts I came to the site with, which was a "what do I do?" I had been harassed by a supervisor in my dept for 2 years and HATED my job. I hated everything about it, the patients, having to get up and go to work in the morning, cleaning the truck, being bothered to run calls. I HATED it all. I was looking for another avenue of work. And then, some things started to change. I stood up for myself against this motherf***er and turned some things around for myself. I am not totally happy right now, but I working back to it.
The point is, this ONE PERSON made me hate this wonderful career that I had attained for myself. If you really want it, you can do it, you can do anyting you put your heart into. If they give you that "just a basic" sh*t, shoot back with, "hey, if you, as a Paramedic were worth a sh*t, you wouldnt have to pick on me..." People that do this job and love it and are good at it, understand the amazing value of Basic EMTs. And yeah, there might be few jokes from those kind of folks, but not the ones designed to hurt your feelings.
Unless you have already made up your mind, my advice is this: 1. Is is just the job that you dont like anymore, or are the mitigating circumstances that, were a little pressure exerted could dramatically impact the way you think about your job? Don't just give up, unless thats what you want. 2. If things could change, would you continue on with this career path or do you see yourself doing something else anyway? 3. Suppose we forget about all the other bullsh*t, would you want this career?
Of course there are a gazillion things to think about...but the one of utmost importance, beyond even your family, husband etc, (i dont know your living situation, just assuming) is that you BE HAPPY. we spend a predominant amount of time at work, more than we see our families sometimes...we have to like where we are and not feel bad about sacrificing that time. Do what makes you HAPPY. because if you arent happy, eventually no one will be. Just my thoughts...