how do you guys handle well meaning but useless suggestions

[emt seeking first job]

So true. If you want to find out for yourself just how connected to one another the EMS community is, just bad mouth an ambulance service director with +10 years experience and apply for a job on the other side of your state. See what they say..

I have not bad mouthed anyone by name ever.

Regardless if they are a 10+ director or a first time EMT.

 

[emt seeking first job]

regarding the vollie I go to

I was just venting, that is what semi-anonymous forums are for

I did not name the organization.

There are mostly good people, in a bad situation, some of them are bizarre, you would have to see it.

I am not going to tell specific annecdotes inorder to not identify anyone ever.

I dont feel entitled to vollie, I show up, if someone tells me to dispatch I do that, ride in the bus, I do that, I pitch in with cleaning etc.

Many experienced EMTs left because the organization has declined over the years, in funding and community interest...

 

[emt seeking first job]

putting my own thread back on topic

This thread is getting off topic.

The topic is in general, how do you handle well meaning advice that is not practical or possible to act on.

For the record, I do not think I am better or worse than anyone else nor deserving of any position paid or otherwise anywhere.

I do not want to discuss the details of my search, my vollieing, or my relationship with my physycian girlfriend.

THE CONSENSUS THUS FAR, seems to be to hear the person out and thank them for their suggestion.

That is good, but then, how do you handle follow up comments when the person repaeats it and asks why you did not carry it out?

 

[DaniGrrl]

THE CONSENSUS THUS FAR, seems to be to hear the person out and thank them for their suggestion.

That is good, but then, how do you handle follow up comments when the person repaeats it and asks why you did not carry it out?

If someone makes a useless suggestion and you have a valid reason why their suggestion is useless, unless they are an idiot, it shouldn't be a challenge to explain your reasoning.
Like so:
Other Person: "You should do _insert well intended suggestion_"
You: "I would but _insert valid reason suggestion isn't helpful_"
Other person: "Oh, I see. I'm sorry I couldn't help."

Et voila.

ETA:
If the above doesn't seem to be working, it may be time to look at your reasoning skills. Maybe you aren't being as objective as the Other Person and their suggestions are more valid than you think. From reading your replies to threads here, it seems that every time someone answers a question that you ask, you have another question. Every time someone makes a suggestion about a situation, you have a counter thought. It's not a bad thing, necessarily, but if you find that you're constantly playing devil's advocate or constantly pointing out what every around you missed, there may come a time when you need to examine whether it's really them or it might be you.

 

[emt seeking first job]

first of all....

The point of forums such as these is to ask and deliberate topics to death. Things we can not delve into face to face.

Hear of the series of books in the 1970s: "Everything you wanted to know about <some topic> but were afraid to ask"

I am usualy afraid to ask.

When I do, I make it succinct, and I drop it at a certain point.

in an online forum, if someone wants to bow out of a thread, they can just back off, in face to face you are often stuck....

 

[emt seeking first job]

specific issues on this original topic:

1. My parents thinking there are other employers of EMTs aside from those listed in the NYS DOH website, ie from my emt school, or some online source. I expained that to my mom she was OK with it.

2. With my girlfriend, last weekend, I had very few driving lessons, so my girlfriend said I should go to my vollie, however, they do not ride on Fridays, and Saturadays nights and Sundays are covered by a set crew. I was told by the scheduling person NEVER to come down Saturdays Sundays except for a special neighborhood event.

Also, she wants me to make myself available to another driving school so when my main one has no work, I can go to the other.

When she did massage therapy, she worked at three different places.

I tried explaining to her that 1) I need a separate credential from the DMV for each school I work for 2) driving schools in NYC are very competitive, unlike massage therapy places, and it just would not be done in that buisness 3) getting any other part time job, they would have to need me when my other job did not, and that does not always happen 4) I did work at an executive car service part time, but they ended up asking, rather demanding, I come in when they had work despite other things I had to do, my other job, I was working on some other things back then.....

My girlfriend (she admits to this ) is often stubborn and forgets things and is often impractical, although she is an excllent doctor and disciplined at studying,,,,she makes mistakes ( with practical matters), has a bad sense of direction, and is argumentative (her family and co-workers have even apprioached her about this)

 

[emt seeking first job]

If someone makes a useless suggestion and you have a valid reason why their suggestion is useless, unless they are an idiot, it shouldn't be a challenge to explain your reasoning.
Like so:
Other Person: "You should do _insert well intended suggestion_"
You: "I would but _insert valid reason suggestion isn't helpful_"
Other person: "Oh, I see. I'm sorry I couldn't help."

Et voila.

ETA:
If the above doesn't seem to be working, it may be time to look at your reasoning skills. Maybe you aren't being as objective as the Other Person and their suggestions are more valid than you think. From reading your replies to threads here, it seems that every time someone answers a question that you ask, you have another question. Every time someone makes a suggestion about a situation, you have a counter thought. It's not a bad thing, necessarily, but if you find that you're constantly playing devil's advocate or constantly pointing out what every around you missed, there may come a time when you need to examine whether it's really them or it might be you.

As I asked, please do not connect every thread together.

I am sure you argue with people in your life.

And as I said, internet forums are semi-anonymous and an approipriate venue for delving into topics.

If I ask a follow up question, people can choose to just ignore it.

Isnt it better that we all ask 1,000,000 questions and another 100 follow ups here then where we serve?

Its simply trading information. It is dangerous to discern intent from the written word.

Where I serve now, my vollie, I ask a few questions, mostly I just sit and follow along with what is happening, and my usual question is " where do want me ", and I get a bag, equip, etc as told, and if I am told to do the intervention myslef I do it, if I am told to hand the item to someone, I do that.

I must be doing at least satisfactorly as I am asked to ride in the bus as often if not more than others in the pool of newbies.

I was asked to a guy's wife's birthday, which I had to bow out of, but I made an appearance anyway to wish her a happy and drop off a small gift (one of those edible arrangement things), one my students parents has a frachise....

 

[emt seeking first job]

you know what, I will bow out of this thread.....

Any future ones, I will just make over specific factual type things.

Thank you everyone who replied. I read everything.

If anyone posts anything further I will read it without replying, I will not try to correct any misunderstanding.

 

[DaniGrrl]

As I asked, please do not connect every thread together.

I am sure you argue with people in your life.

I only mentioned the other threads because they are relevant. There is a definite pattern to how you post and it is VERY relevant to the question you are asking. You seem to be dismissing the ideas you don't like. That's certainly your prerogative, but it speaks to the problem you're having.

Honestly, you kind of remind me of my 14 year old daughter. She's an Aspie and tends to dismiss everyone's opinion out of hand. When I point it out to her, she doesn't understand what I'm saying, she doesn't see her behavior as being dismissive. It's a blind spot she has. In your posting style, you seem to have a similar blind spot. I'm trying to point it out, not to be nasty, but to help answer your original question.

I do argue with people, everyone does. It's healthy.

 

[Aidey]

THE ISSUE IS, well meaning people such as my girlfriend making suggestions that are not realistically actionable, like "just go to paramedic school" etc....

Right now getting a full time job as an EMT B is not realistically actionable. It sounds like the people around you can see that and are trying to help you come up with some other options in the mean time. From your posts here it seems like there is one option and one option only that you are willing to accept. That makes it hard for me to believe that NONE of their suggestions are useful in any way. It kind of sounds like you just don't want to hear their suggestions, so you dismiss them as bad ideas.