Dumbest thing heard on the radio

Sasha

Sasha

Forum Chief
7,667
11
0
Dispatch: 135, what is your ETA to (nursing home facility)
135: 10 to 15 minutes.
Dispatch: Copy.. Unit 142, what is your ETA to (same nursing home facility)
142: 11 to 16 minutes.
 
E

exodus

Forum Deputy Chief
2,895
242
63
Sasha said:
Dispatch: 135, what is your ETA to (nursing home facility)
135: 10 to 15 minutes.
Dispatch: Copy.. Unit 142, what is your ETA to (same nursing home facility)
142: 11 to 16 minutes.
Click to expand...

I've done that :)
 
E

EMTCLM

Forum Crew Member
62
0
0
Dispatcher: EMS please respond to xyz for female who fell off some rocks and has a head laceration...to the head :rolleyes:
 
docmoods

docmoods

Forum Probie
12
0
0
A department near me started getting the audio from funny and odd calls and posting it... Some are pretty funny...


evfc160.com
scroll down and find audio...
 
LucidResq

LucidResq

Forum Deputy Chief
2,031
3
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"Engine XX and Medic XXX, on a 62 yom, conscious and breathing, complaining of frostbite, says his fingers look like vienna sausages."

"Dispatch, Engine XX... confirming fingers look like sausages?"

"Engine XX, that's affirm - fingers resemble sausages."
 
O

orange20medic

Forum Crew Member
35
0
0
BLS crew was bringing in a pt to the ER. Their radio report sounded something like this:

"Medic 2 enroute with 56 y/o female, afraid to leave her house. History of hypochondria."

I think the whole ER cracked up laughing at that report. Definitely made my day!
 
btkspot89

btkspot89

Forum Probie
18
0
0
After a Pretty busy day at my volunteer squad the dispatcher couldnt help it...
Dispatcher "Stand By for dispatch"
Dispatcher <Tones>
Dispatcher "Just Kidding.... for now"
Me "I really hope you don't run into me sometime soon"
 
EMSDude54343

EMSDude54343

Forum Lieutenant
156
0
16
engine giving disposition when clearing an electrical hazard call

"E17 to Marion, its gonna be leaves touching the branches, were complete."
While laughing...."recieved, complete, leaves touching the branches, complete at xxxx (time)"
"..... E17 marion, correction, line touching a branch......"

Imagaine the engine LT saying this half awake at like 0200
 
T

TreySpooner65

Forum Lieutenant
153
7
18
After leaving a Mexican restaurant.
Say the following is a heavy Mexican accent.

"EH! Chu forgot yo radio!"
 
ZombieEMT

ZombieEMT

Chief Medical Zombie
Premium Member
375
28
28
I heard this the other coming back from a call, a good reason why people need to retire at some point.

Ambulance xxxx: *garble garble*
Central: Ambulance xxxx, can you repeat your transmittion.
Ambulance xxxx: more *garble garble*
Central: Ambulance xxxx, move the radio away from your mouth and try talking, it might be more productive.
Ambulance xxxx: Central, the radio was not too close to his mouth. He forgot to put his teeth back in. We are requesting medics for chest pain.
Central (laughing hysterically): Recieved. I hope they are back in now.
 
Anjel

Anjel

Forum Angel
4,548
302
83
Unit 223333: What is the location of the patient?
Dispatch: You want to know where the patient is?
Unit 223333: Um. That would be helpful if you want us to transport.
 
J

johnrsemt

Forum Deputy Chief
1,678
261
83
Dispatch: Tones: Engine, Medic XXX; checkout slippery substance in intersection of AAA x BBB. (In January, during snowstorm). at 0230

Units after arrival: Dispatch be advised slippery substance is ICE!!!
 
XxGAMBLExX

XxGAMBLExX

Forum Probie
15
0
0
I know a guy who is a full-time dispatcher for our county, and a part-time Paramedic. So, while he's on the rig, he will occasionally make farm animal noises. The on duty dispatcher offered to send us animal control, but of course, being a smart-@$$ he replied. That's okay, we'll call their office on Monday. COPY??

Good times. Good times. Other than that there are small things like mimicking our local corporate providers... (not mentioning names, but they are creeping into our county.) Anyways, they have this guy who incessantly feels the need to talk as slow as he can. "Centraallll this is ******** Alpha***.........we're, uhhhh in route to uhhhh **********."

*Names and locations changed to protect the identities of the innocent*
 
C

Captn' Tuddle

Forum Crew Member
39
3
0
Dispach: scuffling and clicking noises follewed by a muffled "AGHHH! THis stupid radio isn't working... *undecipherable mumbling*"
Me: Um, dispatch, you radio is working fine, we can hear you."
Dispatch: Oh, *muffled laughing in background*, wow my face is turning really red right now..."
Me: Copy manditory coffee break.
 
Meursault

Meursault

Organic Mechanic
759
35
28
*tones*
Dispatch: Company dispatching Town Paramedic 10, Town Fire, and Command to 99 White Ave, Apt. 10 for a standby.
Fire: Fire has 99 White Ave.
Supervisor: 1 has 99 White Ave.
Dispatch: Caller reports water leaking from ceiling and an odor.
Medics: Paramedic 10 has the overflowing toilet.
*5 minutes of silence from dispatch*

Of course, the supervisor and fire were cancelled, and the medics hung around for a while (which meant we had town coverage, the jerks) and then called up to report "No EMS required".
 
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