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I keep a Magic 8 Ball in the truck. When patients ask me something, (usually something dumb like "Am I going to die?" when they have a twisted ankle) it's /shakeshakeshake "Signs point to yes."

Our private company provides ALS transport units (in house) to many surrounding fire/primary response districts. This particular one was a large retirement community. We responded in the early morning for an abdominal pain. The patient wanted to go to an ER 1.5 hours away, by-passing two...