Funny Things We Say To Make Our Patients Feel Better - Page 2 - EMTLife.com - The #1 Online Forum for EMS-Related Discussion

Squad51 · 04-14-2012, 07:13 PM

"Don't worry, this is my lucky needle. I never miss with this needle."

"How young are you?"

As you're fastening the seat belts on the cot. "Hold your arms up. Just like you're at 7-11."

"Just like a ride at Six Flags. Except we don't kill anyone."

Caller: Wow! You got here fast!

Us: Thirty minutes or less or it's free!

TheLocalMedic · 04-14-2012, 09:19 PM

For those I'm going to stick with a 20 gauge, "Look, I'm using a little tiny needle, they even colored it pink because it's for girls!"

Putting the cannula on before it's hooked up to oxygen and giving them the other end, "If you feel like you need more air just blow through here"

**bigbaldguy** · 04-14-2012, 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheLocalMedic

Putting the cannula on before it's hooked up to oxygen and giving them the other end, "If you feel like you need more air just blow through here"

That's actually pretty funny. I might steal that.

I just start doing the safety demo from work. Oh, note to self, steal a seat belt extension, safety demo guide and oxygen mask from plane for use as props.

MrandaPechon · 04-15-2012, 03:23 AM

I always thought it would be funny but slightly horrible if when a doctor was putting someone under they said, "Hey guys, I am going to try this one blind folded, so time me."

Cup of Joe · 04-15-2012, 12:01 PM

If patients are scared of a needle: "Don't worry, I won't feel a thing."

Sasha · 04-15-2012, 12:09 PM

Belting them in "Stick em up like this is a robbery" (arms)

"got a couple seat belts for you. You'll appreciate them when my partner starts driving. He's an ex NASCAR driver. They kicked him out for turning right"

"so you wanna stop at the bar on the way? Pick up a couple chicks?"

"Keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times, we are not responsible for any body parts left behind."

"this is our hipaa form. It is also a great cure for insomnia. Reading it always puts me right to sleep."

I try my hardest to make patients smile.

pips11 · 04-15-2012, 12:13 PM

too funny!

medic417 · 04-15-2012, 12:17 PM

Don't worry I won't let Sasha touch you.

mm505 · 04-15-2012, 09:23 PM

This is my first time in an Ambulance, too! Make sure you fill out the Paramedic Survey when you get out to the hospital.

I actually had a person ask me to write down my name so they could!

**NJN** · 04-15-2012, 11:09 PM

For pulse ox "Gimmie the finger"

04-14-2012, 07:13 PM	#11
Squad51 Forum Crew Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Texas Posts: 43 Training: NREMT-P	"Don't worry, this is my lucky needle. I never miss with this needle." "How young are you?" As you're fastening the seat belts on the cot. "Hold your arms up. Just like you're at 7-11." "Just like a ride at Six Flags. Except we don't kill anyone." Caller: Wow! You got here fast! Us: Thirty minutes or less or it's free! __________________ EMS Rules of Survival- 1. Eat before you're hungry. 2. Sleep whenever you can. 3. Don't ever pass up a bathroom.

04-15-2012, 11:09 PM	#20
NJN Community Leader Emeritus The Young One Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: The Looney Bin, NJ Posts: 487 Training: FF/EMT-B	For pulse ox "Gimmie the finger" __________________ C. Piv "Carpe Per-Dium" "NUTS" General Anthony McAuliffe 101st Airborne

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04-14-2012, 09:19 PM	#12
TheLocalMedic Forum Lieutenant Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Northern California Posts: 238 Training: EMT-Paramedic	For those I'm going to stick with a 20 gauge, "Look, I'm using a little tiny needle, they even colored it pink because it's for girls!" Putting the cannula on before it's hooked up to oxygen and giving them the other end, "If you feel like you need more air just blow through here"

04-15-2012, 03:23 AM	#14
MrandaPechon Forum Ride Along Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Paso Robles, CA Posts: 5 Training: EMT-Basic InProgress	I always thought it would be funny but slightly horrible if when a doctor was putting someone under they said, "Hey guys, I am going to try this one blind folded, so time me."

04-15-2012, 12:01 PM	#15
Cup of Joe Forum Captain Join Date: Jul 2011 Posts: 273 Training: EMT/Firefighter	If patients are scared of a needle: "Don't worry, I won't feel a thing."

04-15-2012, 12:09 PM	#16
Sasha Forum Chief Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Down the rabbit hole Posts: 7,667 Training: EMT-Awesome	Belting them in "Stick em up like this is a robbery" (arms) "got a couple seat belts for you. You'll appreciate them when my partner starts driving. He's an ex NASCAR driver. They kicked him out for turning right" "so you wanna stop at the bar on the way? Pick up a couple chicks?" "Keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times, we are not responsible for any body parts left behind." "this is our hipaa form. It is also a great cure for insomnia. Reading it always puts me right to sleep." I try my hardest to make patients smile.

04-15-2012, 12:13 PM	#17
pips11 Forum Ride Along Join Date: Apr 2012 Posts: 5	too funny!

04-15-2012, 09:23 PM	#19
mm505 Forum Crew Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: Cobb County, Georgia Posts: 50 Training: EMT-Paramedic	This is my first time in an Ambulance, too! Make sure you fill out the Paramedic Survey when you get out to the hospital. I actually had a person ask me to write down my name so they could!